#179 Feeling is exhausting

From breakdowns to breakthroughs

Hello friend,

When you're used to living in your head, dropping into the body can feel overwhelming.

The resistance is real. You don’t always want to feel. When old, stuck emotions start surfacing, they can flood your system as tears, anger, and sometimes as loud sobs with no warning.

Sometimes, there’s no sense of time or space. It feels like you’re losing control over your perception of reality and yourself. It feels like an emotional breakdown.

When this happens, place your hands on your heart and remind yourself:

“I got you. I got this. I am here. I’m experiencing it all, but my experience is not me. It will move through me if I allow it. I am safe to feel it all.”

This truly works based on what I’ve been moving through this month.

I’ve realized this is more than just meditation, where you become aware and tend to disassociate from your thoughts. That’s only the first step. The real challenge is to stay aware not just of your thoughts but of your body and the sensations and emotions that rise within it.

More importantly, sometimes you need to physically remind yourself that you are safe and you can trust your body to go through everything it is experiencing.

Once you learn to consciously go through these breakdowns, they become breakthroughs.

In the days that follow, you might notice new insights emerging. Honor them. Sit with them. Let them slowly sink into your whole being.

But when you do this work, remember that it can take a toll on your physical body.

Over the last two weeks, I wrote about what happens when you let yourself feel it all.

But only in the last few days, I realized how physically and mentally tired it made me. I had a couple of sleepless nights, and on the other days, I slept 9 to 10 hours with 1 to 2-hour naps in the afternoon. I wanted to write this newsletter earlier, but I simply didn’t have the energy.

Lately, I’ve been processing most of my emotional reactions internally, rather than reaching out to a friend or therapist to talk it out. As a result, it left me with little energy to focus on anything else.

The extreme of anything is never helpful, and that applies to inner work too.

This evening, I finally got a chance to speak to someone close and share what was going on. Just an hour of conversation left me feeling lighter, with deeper insight into what I’ve been experiencing.

Of course, had I not done the work myself, maybe I wouldn’t have been as open to receiving or understanding those insights.

You need both. The solitude to feel and reflect and the safe presence of another to witness and hold space.

Also, honor your body’s need to rest while you let it feel everything. You might be surprised how deeply tired you feel; not just emotionally, but physically too. And that’s okay. It’s all part of the process.

Trust the process. Trust yourself. Trust your body. And trust the good people in your life. They’ll help you stay grounded as you turn your emotional breakdowns into breakthroughs.

Until next time,
Love,
Ved

PS: For the next few weeks, I want to test publishing every Saturday or Sunday when I’m more relaxed, instead of the middle of the week when I tend to rush.
So, keep an eye on your inbox over the weekend!